“I didn’t want to get into bed with or go home with a guy from a bar and find out these things in an awkward vulnerable unsafe manner,” she added.
This is when Hawkes found Chayse, who had been in the escort industry for six years.
After sending him an email, the pair video called to discuss any questions and whether there’d be any potential challenges.
She recalled: “I asked my million questions and told him I’d think about it. But the more I thought about it, the more I said I’d have to try it.”
Hawkes felt reassured by Chayse’s answers and their first appointment was at his house.
Hawkes explained that it was the first time she had been undressed in front of a man, aside from a medical appointment.
She said she felt ‘out of my depth’ and ‘completely overwhelmed.’
However, the pair hit it off and Hawkes soon relaxed.
During the appointment, the 43-year-old realized she didn’t have to limit herself and now pays for Chayse’s services regularly.
Hawkes added: “Whenever I have a session with Chayse I’m always looking forward to it and really excited and can’t wipe the smile off my face afterwards.”
She now says her ‘ultimate goal’ is to meet a man and find romance, explaining: “To be honest, I’m looking for a Chayse replacement for free this time. Somebody who loves me and loves what I like, and can replace Chayse and do everything for free.”
Hawkes revealed the reason she opted for an escort was to be ‘in control’ and to ‘explore all these different things in the bedroom.’
She added: “My confidence is growing heaps. I’m happier than I’ve ever been. You can’t put a price on that life-changing experience.”
